Hi Friends and Fellow Bloggers – I hope that you are as well as you can be. When I first started my blog, I thought it would be a place where I could be happy, motivated, inspirational even to keep the grim lot of you going. Then life and mental illness happened and I realized despite trying to spread the sunshine, there were times, too many times, when my experience that the skies were grey. I thought it would be best to not write. There were times I couldn’t or found that the lack of me really had nothing to say. Perhaps however, that is the best time to talk and tell others what’s going on.
Perhaps there are others who can relate feeling like cinder blocks tied to their bodies in bed regardless of the time of the day or perhaps not wanting to talk or see anyone. I have hypo-mania which I best describe as depression on red bull/energy drinks, where despite what you’re feeling which is awfully convenient because I can’t sit still for my family who receive several meals per day. On top of all this great stuff there are handfuls for pills that must be taken each day at the right time and a run around a block if you can manage to because well mental health and vitamin. Difficult stuff.
Perhaps what we are supposed to do is reach out, to talk about cinder blocks, to talk about how we are feeling, the good, the bad, and the ugly because I don’t think that anyone who doesn’t experience these days, moods, feelings and pretty much anything mental illness can truly understand. About being clumsy, the incessant reminders that you aren’t enough and that anxiety will take you out because this does happen particularly when you’re out, and it’s tremendously terrible. I want my blog and the engagement with it to be real. So I am saying that sometimes skies are grey.
4 M's Bipolar Mom 