Im blogged out. I am blogless / blooged? Blooged is like the depression of a blog. You want to write, you think you should write but you just feel BLOOGED. Thats what’s happened to me and I know precisely why.
Over the last two weeks I have literally been working day and night on a project my boss deemed mission critical. A drop everything and save the day request complete with fighting stakeholders, impossible deadlines and my personal fav: way out of my job description and not something I would be evaluated on. Blooger (that’s code for depressed blog swearing). But because I work in a space where I care about what I do and the people’s lives it changes, I don’t mind.
The truth is though that these people, my boss have not acted in a way that demonstrates they care. When coming out of hospital their first question was how will you cope? The stress won’t be reduced? Loving souls aren’t they?
And I am repeating the very same work pattern I employed before last being hospitalised. Too little sleep, dangerous deadlines, multiple demands, even forgetting to take medication (!). Failing to calm down, failing to take care of me. Maybe its not just my blog that’s blooged. I think I’m blooging me.
Any good professional Bipolar will tell you that you should never sacrifice your mental health. Your peace. Your time. Your mood. But slipping down deep happens. Usually when you least expect it. Actually I take that back. It can be preventable. You should never sell your inner self. But its that very part of me that’s so appealing to everyone else.
I am blooging. And will be for a while. Be part of those who support us as opposed to those who don’t. I am 4’Ms Bipolar Mom.
4 M's Bipolar Mom 